Nice tip! michael_walker69  Oh, I’m all for yelling and screaming. Anonymous. Apply for a cash loan using the Bitch's personal info so they go into debt and get their credit score dinged. You need to find out what is precious to him. Pretend to be a customer where the Bitch works, then complain to the manager or file a formal complaint. Leading by example is a good way to alter someone’s behavior. Starting at around $3,500 and going as high as the cost of a full-page color ad in the Times, skywriting is not cheap. Or subscribe without commenting. jcereola1  Well played, sir. -You failed an interview. She knows she's been caught and ruined now. 3 2. Well, look through them into their soul where fear and anxiety hide. Fortunately, public records search engines make it entirely possible to find all the info you need about anyone with only a name or phone number. Exaggerate the Bitch's features—the more hideous, the better—but if creating a disfiguring wart or triple chin out of chicken wire and glue-sodden newspaper proves too tricky, simply hang a sign around the effigy”s neck with the Bitch's name scrawled on it. Ah yes! A classic. When your 3-year-old ends a FaceTime call with his grandmother by saying, “Now be sure to hit the ‘like’ button and subscribe to my channel,” it may be time to rein in the YouTube watching. It isn’t always easy to recognize the signs of mental and emotional abuse. Guilt and remorse have no place in laughing at someone. An aerial banner is a much cheaper way to go, as it only requires one plane and allows you to display a more complex message. It’s all part of the dehumanization. Laughter is the finest insult. For some reason I went to Father and Son  which is one of the saddest tunes ever written. Yet they STILL DO IT. “I am an irredeemable serial philanderer,” thought [Bitch’s name],” and any woman in her right mind should avoid me like the plague.”. Bark texts at your wife in the passenger seat who will be more than happy to send your messages out. I just tried the laughing thing. The mock and run! So I laughed at him. Then, it’s off to my pickup truck. If your roommate is a friend, using this … In order to become psychologically aligned we need to follow the proceeding three steps: Awareness: We need to become intensely aware of our actions. MicheleLeAnn  Jim Croce was a master at a fuck-you in a smile in his songs. Your girlfriends will happily don the custom T-shirts you provide with the Bitch's image emblazoned across the front and  “Beware!” printed in bold red lettering, as long as the cut doesn't make them look fat. She just turned around and walked out of the room. This step is the most crucial in the plan, because without certain information, it will be very difficult to go about anything in Step 3. Well, my friend, you might need to take this revenge public. If you have someone in mind that you would like to live with, try saying something like, "I've really enjoyed living with you, but one of my best friends is moving and I'd like to try living with them when our lease is up." Might I also suggest, for those days you just don’t have a good sarcastic “Ha!” available, I find a genuine full eye contact when possible, “THANK YOU! The two are often used in conjunction with one another and often overlap in practice, with the fear and paininduced by physical torture often resulting in long-term psychological effects, and many forms of psychological tortu… But if you just simply walk away, showing zero emotion whatsoever, it infuriates them. Great post! Now, let's say you've either completed the steps above and realized it's just not enough to satisfy your vengeance, or you know you're the type of person who won't take satisfaction in anything less than publicly humiliating someone to get back at them. Oh yeah, don’t text and drive. Soul crushing. It says “You’re too low on my list of concerns to even put together an insult, so I’ll just laugh at you.”  I use it often, glad to know I’m not the only one. Your email address will not be published. He’s so mellow that even when he’s screaming it sounds soft and timid. This is one of the simple psychology tricks you’ve probably already heard of before. For years, I thought saying “no” meant I would disappoint a good friend or someone I … Satisfaction. YoungmanBrown  Ooh – that’s solid. The client was dealing with a workplace bully…. Steer clear of any bad feelings by telling yourself that they made you do it. However, once your Bitch takes her seat in the dock, and surviving witnesses parade through the courtroom recounting horrific tales of her offenses—for instance, it turns out that you are only one of scores of lovers she told were “the best she ever had” before cleaning out their bank accounts—it will be well worth the wait, and after all, don't they say revenge is best served cold? Do you have any rational reason to believe that torment is an effective method of recourse, or are you more interested in vengeance? It’s a huge, beautiful bummer. This–well it works for females–works well laughing at men in bars who think they are the epitome of cool and try to hit on you with quasi-insulting pickup lines. Note: For brevity's sake, and to avoid gender specific pronouns as much as possible, the receiver of torment will from this point forward be referred to as “the Bitch.”. I proudly carried this role all through grade school, college, even through law school. These are all things to take into account when torturing someone mentally. I went no contact. Well, the last thing you need on your permanent record is assault and battery, so I would highly advise against physical violence…unless, of course, you're absolutely certain you won't be identified for wrecking someone. Whatever you do, don't say anything that could be construed as admission of guilt to your enemy. Buffoon! Writing Satire for the Internet The best way to evisercate and destroy someone’s well being is to laugh at them. Oh boy. Never tried it while biking. Shame!” like a gaggle of enthusiastic Puritan conventioneers. A friend who is a psychotherapist told me that one. I'll never give this child another cigarette, pinky swears! Although not all psychological torture involves the use of physical violence, there is a continuum between psychological torture and physical torture. Subscribe to spammers and porn newsletters with the Bitch's email address. Move forward 3 squares When the Bitch appears confused, protesting “I've never seen these people before in my life!” it will only make the audience doubt his innocence more. Tell the baby mama to go “Maury” on his ass, pointing at various parts of the child's anatomy and screeching, “Look at that nose! -You found an unpaid internship. I find a friendly wave is the best way to pour salt in that wound.Great post as always,WG. Actor Shia LaBeouf spent $25,000 to commission five planes to spell “Stop creating” over Los Angeles, and several messages in the blue Pasadena sky over the 2016 Rose Parade calling Donald Trump “disgusting” and “a fascist dictator” might have cost Republican real estate developer Stan Pate five times that amount. Parents in neighboring seats recoil from the defamed soccer mom, protectively shielding their children as they scurry out of the park, forgetting in their haste to ask who is providing refreshments for next weekend's game. Share one of your wacky ideas in which you think would be a great way to torture someone. If your Bitch is a Catholic, Mormon or Scientologist, the rejection of his church will have the powerful effect of ruining his life not only in this world, but in the next. !Hmm…  I’m going to say…  Briti… Wait, no. Now the trick to successfully killing someone’s spirit by laughing is very simple – in that moment, you must hate them so much that yelling would be a waste of your time. Known as someone who would step up, I would gladly make time, especially when it came to volunteering for certain causes. I agree Father and Son is the freakin’ saddest song ever! I'll offer some ideas here to sabotage someone, but be creative! People with NPD are not necessarily sadistic, but the ones who are make monstrous abusers who will torment those, in a parallel universe, they are meant to love. For the rest of you, here are some covert tactics you can employ to get revenge and destroy your ex, friend, enemy, boss, or any guy or girl you want, at little or no expense, and which will be infinitely more entertaining to you and your friends than kicking the bastard in the balls or otherwise inflicting fleeting physical pain on the person. Some people are jerks like that. Either one. I particularly enjoy waving. Send dirt (pictures, arrest record, etc.) Mr. Stevens reminds me of the few things about life I love. When you give someone all of that, you’re giving a part of you that you cannot take back. Nice one Paris!Michael A. WalkerDefying Procrastination. Thank you to The Neurotypical Site for insights into psychological coercion based on … Is this cruel? I remember a great line a client once told me (I’m a psychologist and I now use this line to teach other people how much stronger you look and feel when you do NOT rise to a fight/challenge that is inane). Guam would have been cooler. workingdan  I like this one too. Great post. It’s a whole other level of awesome. If you don't know the Bitch intimately, become close. Many interrogation techniques employed at Guantánamo Bay and elsewhere were specifically designed to exploit psychological weaknesses of detainees. Picture a beautiful, cloudless Saturday morning at a neighborhood park, where your former employer is attending her kid's soccer game, her unjust firing of you the furthest thing from her mind. If you haven’t laughed at somebody in a long time, put it on your to-do list. Perhaps he wouldn't have run away with that auto show model if he'd known it would damn his soul for all eternity? Emotional bullying is when a person tries to get what they want by making others feel angry or afraid. Report the Bitch's vehicle stolen so they get pulled over the next time a cop sees them driving around (have the license plate and vehicle description ready). A full-page spread in the Sunday New York Times will go a long way towards informing the public, or at least its literate elite portion, of your Bitch's offenses, but at $150,000 a pop (and that's just for black & white!) The best response: “I have no idea what you're talking about.” End of conversation. tfpHumorBlog  MarieLoerzel  Among many smart things…. I unintentionally laughed in the face of a bully once and was stunned by her reaction. you may have to take out a second mortgage on your home. Points in Case   Mon-Fri, Comedy Business School Delete all the photos on your social media that indicate you ever had a life before children. But then I like making people laugh. Either way, it got her to leave me alone and I have used it ever since. All you need to do is set a high standard for something and give them a little time. I was shocked to learn even in Muslim countries they don’t know his new stuff he sings as Yusuf Islam. In the event you choose to go this route, there are some very affordable ski masks available online or at your local burglar and rapist outfitters. Look, skinny weirdo bike dick – there’s six feet on either side of me and nobody around. Then, move on. The Second City   Mar 8, Coaching & Feedback on Your Writing After looking into their eyes and laughing you must walk away. So when I grocery shopped there the store would frequently play Father and Son and I would sob my way through the chick peas. Luckily, with public records search engines, it's easy to find a lot of information about anyone with only a name or phone number. These tactics, when executed correctly, will exact humiliation, pain, and suffering on your victim. However, unless you, your Bitch, or both are celebrities, attracting the attention of a major, or even minor publishing house, is unlikely. But the dad completely understands. In fact I believe the songs may have instructed my body to produce estrogen because I was immediately craving bon-bons. That works great, too. Have you ever just wanted to slap a bitch, kick a douche in the balls, or really fuck someone over? I do it in conversations sometimes too. This is a really petty way of "Ruining" someones life. All of these sites will give you plenty of inside intel to work with, so start gathering info first: You can also go old school and Google the Bitch's name, Twitter or Instagram username, or email address to dig up information, sketchy associations (for instance, a profile on TransgenderSwingers.com), pictures, and anything else that could come in handy later. Nothing is more dehumanizing. – Shannon L. Alder Hurting the narcissist who made your life a living hell may sound like a good idea in your head, but it’s unlikely to bring you the peace you desire. 9) Pull out their fingernails and toenails one by one with a rusted pair of tweesers. On to the fun part. MUHAHAHA. Oh, and then make sure to forgive yourself. You can't put the genie back in the bottle; once a person's reputation is destroyed, no amount of creative spin can erase the public's memory—just ask O.J. Again, doing your homework is of utmost importance, because without certain information and knowledge, it will be very difficult to carry out any of these methods. Their shouting and cursing only increases and they look like the fool! Move back 3 squares. Not surprised, that house always housed a different breed, from former persons involved with murders to guys robbing their bosses to drug dealers being arrested in driveways. Psychological torture or mental torture is a type of torture that relies primarily on psychological effects, and only secondarily on any physical harm inflicted. Here, I want to focus on (1)—the actual physical sensation of pain, although the techniques I'll describe can help with any physical discomfort. 6. Whatever your reason for manipulating someone, play your cards right and hone your manipulation skills. Simpson or Anthony Weiner. And you feel empathy for both. If the Bitch was an ex-boyfriend/girlfriend, go on dates with other people in very public places or tell your friends how much better your new partner or special somebody is in bed than that last guy/girl…what was their name? ArieFras  I applaud this. Some of the worst techniques have gone out of style for their heinousness, but others, it is suspected, continue to be used, especially by secret government agencies. When you smile at someone they usually reciprocate with a smile and this is associated to acceptance and making a connection with someone, it's the opposite of rejection. there are medications for what you have. Torturing someone mentally is a disgusting thing to do, i was put down and emotionally abused by my ex for 5 years and instead of getting revenge i have shown him i am the better person by getting on with my life and having a great life now. Another resource you can use is your local sheriff's office website, where you can search arrest and jail records for the Bitch's name. People hate being ignore… “I won’t be ignored, Dan!” ~ Fatal Attraction. Before you read any further, I must warn you that publicly ruining someone's life is no joke. Sorry for not being from someplace cooler. -But you did not get hired. If you’re going to pass me just shut up and do it. If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind. I must have been close to the bike lane divider line because some asshole in the full loser bike gear yelled at me as he’s passing me. Ever the advocate of peaceful resistance, I will say this much: sometimes the best solution is to simply say, “Fuck you, cunnilingus mother fucking dickhole,” and walk away…just walk away. Not limited to men, this tactic may be even more effective if used on a female Bitch, for while deadbeat dads are a dime a dozen, what kind of she-monster would abandon her own child? Make a jail cell in your basement and keep someone locked inside and give them some game and tell them if they can beat a certain score you'll let them go; but make it extremely high and basically impossible to get and see how long it takes them to lose their shit. Direct the pair to show up at the Bitch's workplace, preferably when he is presiding over a board meeting or pitching a campaign to an important client. I like world traveling, downhill skiing, snowshoeing, backpacking, camping, running, hiking, and... See full profile ». But don't be an idiot and fall for the ruse yourself, like the classic spy movie twist where the chick sleeps with her target then falls in love and fucks up the mission. Here are my own top 10: 10) Pull out their hair, strand by strand or go crazy and just tug and pull. To them. Telling the Bitch's story from your point of view can be a cathartic experience, and if you are lucky enough to get your book published, you can spread news of his crimes far and wide. I went into a deep alpha-like trance and the world dissolved into itself. The simple act of smiling releases endorphins in the brain and both laughter and smiling are contagious. I always forget that Cat Stevens is like 30mg of Valium snorted on an empty stomach. If your budget allows, hire five child/mother pairs—one for each workday—of diverse ages and ethnicities. When it’s just you and them alone. Try this next time you’re dealing with a bully/predator. Replace them with a solid wall of photos of your kids. For some of these ideas, you'll need to start another email account that cannot be linked to you. Like the old cliche goes, revenge is a dish best served cold. To them. You used the word jerk as a noun. It’s called the silent treatment. I still maintain no contact she blocked me again. to the Bitch's parents or other family members if you can. And Moroccans LOVE Cat Stevens. The bikers who scare the crap out of me by being just around the bend behind a hill on a narrow road make me want to scream with frustration. I’ve laughed at bullies that just look at me all surprised like “okay, she thought me making fun of her putting earthquake cracks in the  cement  when she walks, funny. After a few days (or hours), the Bitch will most likely contact you, kindly requesting that you cease the tormenting. If the Bitch was in your circle of friends before, exclude them from things you do together or refuse to acknowledge the Bitch when you're out with your friends. Don't be surprised if you feel the uncontrollable urge to let out sardonic, maniacal laughing. Mobbing also referred to by some as Bullying, psychological terrorism, and organizational violence is described as a collective form of psychological violence in which many individuals unite to persecute an individual by making constant negative remarks, repeated criticism or sarcasm, intimidation, threats, insinuations, try to humiliate, circulate false information concerning the individual, and to socially … Dei Starr  Let’s play the”Where Is Dei From Game”!! Points in Case is a daily literary humor publication featuring enlightening and irreverent comedy from seasoned writers and fresh voices. Wouldn't you be deserving of psychological torment for being a vile person, by attempting to cause them torment? Let them feel like they’re talking to a wall. My wife didn’t appreciate it at all. Demand that your Bitch be tried in front of an international tribunal at the Hague. There is no shortage in the many ways psychological pain is referred to, and using a different word usually reflects an emphasis on a particular aspect of mind life. If you had you would think twice about deliberately hurting another person. Now the trick to successfully killing someone’s spirit by laughing is very simple – in that moment, you must hate them so much that yelling would be a waste of your time. . Especially shouted out the window whilst driving. Most people don't have any arrests to hide, but if they do then you've hit the jackpot. I see your point and I’ll keep this in mind. Nothing is more dehumanizing. Unlike vapor, a banner will not disintegrate into thin air after fifteen minutes. . You want your close friendship or relationship with the Bitch to be as believable as possible. 1 THE EFFECTS OF PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE. This may be the ideal venue to expose the Bitch's Ponzi scheme or insider trading, but not as appropriate for broadcasting how he heartlessly broke up with you by text message. photo credit: Richard Masoner / Cyclelicious via photo pin cc. And bikers get killed for being dumb enough to face off against cars that can’t see them in time. Thanks! Friendly waives are amazing, too. By the way, your skin tight spandex shirt is not exactly a lady panty-melter. The Second City   Feb 13, Writing for Late Night TV and Talk Shows You really REALLY have to make your face blank (don’t show that you’ve been hurt) OR be so good at laughing that it sounds completely and utterly genuine (when it’s sooo not). I guarantee that if you pull off even one of these strategies, you will sleep better at night, while your Bitch may need to be heavily sedated. Usually I’ll blast some Metallica or something exciting, loud, and fast. Look up a phone number to find out who it belongs to, Find them with a confidential people search, Post an adult dating/hookup ad under “men seeking men” (for a straight guy)—or something equally embarrassing for any other gender/orientation—so the Bitch will receive a steady flow of colorful calls/texts/messages from friendly locals looking to have a good time. It is mental suffering; mental torment." Simply look them dead in the eye. And then you speed away, leaving them wondering who the hell they saw until it drives them mad . If the above options are a little rich for your blood, you can always buy a page in your local weekly rag, which might be as damaging to your Bitch’s reputation as the NYT or WSJ if you live in a small town. She blocked me on whatsapp. 4. Having spent many a long evening nodding sympathetically while you used your Cosmopolitan-inspired psychiatric expertise to drunkenly diagnose your ex-boyfriend with borderline personality disorder, your loyal BFFs will find it a refreshing change of pace to stand outside the Bitch's place of employment with you, wagging their fingers menacingly and chanting, “Shame! Knowing you have completely ignored them and their final words have gone unheard sends them into self implosion. MarieLoerzel  I just loved when he said it was cool if they put Salman Rushdie to death. actually, in a way that makes me want to keep reading your blog. She waned me to try to find someone and if I felt that someone is not good then come back to me. Call an adult escort service (search for one in your area if necessary) and make an appointment for an escort or stripper to go to their house at ungodly hours of the morning or night on days you know the Bitch has off from work and will be home. If the Bitch shares a mailbox with a roommate, request that literature from the Church of Scientology and sex toy or condom catalogs be sent to their address in Bitch's name. Dei Starr  Bummer. 2 3. Also rocked a killer mustache. Avoid libel suits by claiming to read your Bitch's mind. That will help. 1 June 2010 . Yes, I know my license is suspended but don’t worry – ’cause we ain’t going to be drivin’./just to be clear, that is NOT my style, I just tell them negative ghost rider the rotation is full as all there buddies die laughing. Or cough up a few hundred (or thousand) bucks to put their name or photo along with their offenses on a billboard in your city—hey, it worked for the Bitch in the movie Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri. Anonymous. Around here it’s legal for them to drive on any road a car can go on (save the major highways with speeds of 100 km/h). A psychic could regard those subtleties in the same way we typically perceive the road before us, a discussion from a buddy or the preference of a fresh strawberry. ModMomBeyondIndieDom  Point at them during the laugh. Like the time they sharted during ceramics class and everyone laughed. Nobody deserves to be cheated on. If she's a bitch, its probably because someone made her that way. Instead, offer them sincere praise in their achievements. Work your way up from being acquaintances to best friends, fuck buddies, or lovers. Fight back – which definitely works since bullies stand down if you can find your balls and hold your ground. If they have ever been booked by that county, you can see all the details, from the time of arrest to all prior offenses. Usually I’m the one being laughed at. These are some of the thoughts your Bitch will torture himself with as his guardian devil turns up the heat another 500 degrees, and the skin on his backside sputters and pops like a panful of pork cracklings. The best way to incite an online reputation management nightmare is to flat out ignore people. The way to psychologically aligning oneself is a traitorous, where many veer to steer clear of. If your Bitch is in the corporate world, you can buy a full page ad in The Wall Street Journal for the slightly more affordable rate of $45,000 for black & white and $55,000 for color. Make sure to have a matching shirt made for your French bulldog, Vinnie, that sports the caption “Hates Animals” over the Bitch's likeness. Ital…  Nah, give me a second…  Guam! You may be tempted to give a quick-witted rebuttal, something to the effect of, “You had it coming,” but refrain. The Spandex people ride past my house constantly, so tomorrow I can practice my “Dick Laugh”! What crowd can resist the sight of an oversized papier-mâché head atop a highly flammable cape, doused in kerosene and set afire on your Bitch's front lawn? Daniel Kramer ’11. I hope this article has given you some productive avenues to explore as you seek to destroy your Bitch's future, sabotage his present, and make him deeply regret his past, especially the part that included you. Whoever the Bitch is, nothing will hurt them more than to see that you really don't give a shit about them, that you have moved on and found success in your job, relationship, school, or new friendships. Your book's cover might read: “Scum!” The Unauthorized Biography of [Bitch's Name] by [Your Name], as told to [Ghostwriter's Name]. Someone is saying stuff to you to try and piss you off, and you just act like you didn’t hear it and start talking about something else. When it’s just you and them alone. Don't let the Bitch's memory taint the quality of your life. tfpHumorBlog  Dei Starr  I know. Move back a square Don't do that. It’s a son basically telling his dad to sit on it (like the Fonz!) Actually, in a way that makes me want to continue reading your blog. 1 decade ago. It gets me going and most of the time I’m fighting a nasty head-wind. Hire a child actor from your local casting agent, along with an actress to play his/her mother. Skylark Diner sucks you in like a black hole and you can't even see the Texas-size soup dumplings over at Xiao Lone Star Bao. I do this all the time…..also effective, when dealing with dickwads: “Listen to you….”, followed by maniacal cackling. Narcissistic/Sociopathic (narcopathic) abuse takes place when a narcissist or sociopath (or narcopath) attempts to convince someone who has discovered their unbelievably shallow secrets, gradually over time, that they are crazy and proceeds to manipulate them into keeping quiet or to ultimately face their wrath. This confirms that love puts humans’ spirits the extraordinary power makings them willing to come up Heaven or come down Hell with their real love. Lady J  Hey, I’m one of those guys. I despise bikers. If possible, don't reveal your malevolent intentions to anyone. Mostly, instead of making them feel humiliated, it would give them a satisfied look like “maybe she’s not so bad after all”. Ha. When someone cheats on you, you start to question your worth. Keep shaming people with laughter! He was an angry dude for being a folk singer. Required fields are marked *. Being the architect of someone's public ruin has the added benefit of deterring future offenders, for once prospective mates, rivals or employers see what you are capable of, they will be sure to treat you with the absolute deference and respect that you deserve. I would totally buy you lemon drop shots until you fell off the barstool. Bonus points for originality! he simply said the man… “you don’t even get my competitive juices flowing.” Simple… perfect…. If your command of the written word is not up to the task, don't hesitate to hire a ghostwriter. 7 years ago. Try out a variety of manipulation techniques, and learn how to manipulate people in a variety of situations. As I recall, I didn’t find her words funny. They’re that insignificant. Plus, you never know if they’re going to throw a haymaker. (You have to be careful with this one though, because you can't impersonate anyone by using his/her name or contact information on the actual posting.). Patience will be key here, for your case could take at least thirty years to work its way through the courts, and require the gathering of thousands of signatures. It's best just to play nice, as a general rule, but when someone fucks you over, there's nothing more pathetic than being a sap who sits at home and cries about it.
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